Healthy Relationships… With Your Friends

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We all need friends….

Your friends might be your neighbours, your cousins or siblings, people at school or on your sports team, or people you grew up with. You may be the kind of person who has a lot of friends, or you might enjoy the company of a few close ones. Whatever you prefer, we all want to live and share life with other people we click with.

It can be a real confi dence booster to be surrounded by friends who make you feel good about yourself. But remember, it’s not that easy for everyone. Some people have a tough time fi nding good friends.

WHY NOT REACH OUT TO SOMEONE IN YOUR CLASS WHO MIGHT BE IN NEED OF A FRIEND? WHO KNOWS? HE OR SHE MIGHT HELP YOU BECOME AN EVEN BETTER PERSON!

ASK YOURSELF THIS QUESTION:

  • Who are some of your closest friends?
  • How did you meet them?
  • What do you like about them?

RELATIONSHIPS WITH FRIENDS CHANGE OVER TIME.

If you are having problems with your friends, there are lots of ways to deal with them.

One of the most obvious ways – the one that people don’t often think of – is…just talk to them! Of course, when it really comes down to it, the people who stress you out are not good for you. Your real friends will stick by you, no matter what.

At different times in your life, you might find yourself with different groups of friends. Maybe you have one group of friends for sport activities and another for crafts. You might even have certain friends who are really good at helping you out with particular issues. It’s OK to have different groups of friends – variety is healthy!

Take this survey:

  • Am I trying to fit into the right group for me?
  • Am I sacrificing myself to be with the “in crowd?”
  • How important is this, really?
  • What is it costing me to fit in?
  • Do I really like them and want to spend time with them?
  • Do I like to do the same things they do?
  • Do I like the way they treat other people?

IF YOU ARE SACRIFICING YOUR BELIEFS OR VALUES JUST TO FIT IN WITH SOME PEOPLE, THINK ABOUT IT AND ASK IF THESE ‘FRIENDSHIPS’ ARE REALLY WORTH IT.

Getting – or keeping – a friend at any cost may be too costly. Think about the pros and cons of your friendships with different people.

What do I do if one of my friends is saying bad stuff about me online?

  • SPEAK UP - If someone sends you a text, tweet or email that makes you uncomfortable, tell someone safe that you can trust (ex: a family member, Elder, teacher, police offi cer or a friend).
  • CONTROL YOUR ONLINE PRESENCE - Increase your privacy settings online, hide your profile and block users you don’t want to connect with.
  • SAVE THE EVIDENCE - With the help of a safe and trusted adult, save negative messages, pictures and copies of online or text conversations.
  • KNOW WHERE TO GO - There are supports and services available to help you deal with this kind of stuff. You can fi nd help at Get Cyber Safe.
  • ALWAYS REPORT INCIDENTS OF CYBERBULLYING - Inform the appropriate authorities (ex: teachers, principals, police).

Programs like RespectED Violence and Abuse Prevention, run by the Canadian Red Cross, offers helpful information about dealing with this issue. Go to Red Cross and click on What We Do for more information on this program.

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